


Rules Are Made To Be Broken

by vix_spes



Category: James Bond (Craig movies), James Bond (Movies), Skyfall (2012) - Fandom
Genre: 00QNYP, Humor, M/M, Sarcasm
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-11-05
Updated: 2015-11-05
Packaged: 2018-04-30 02:30:03
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,658
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5146967
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/vix_spes/pseuds/vix_spes
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Q has one rule. It's very simple. He sleeps with every double-0 agent but only ever once. Then again, rules are made to be broken aren't they?</p>
            </blockquote>





	Rules Are Made To Be Broken

**Author's Note:**

  * For [beili](https://archiveofourown.org/users/beili/gifts).



> Huge thanks to Small_Hobbit and aln63ny for the fantastic beta-ing.
> 
> Written for the following prompt: Q sleeps with every double-0 once, but makes an exception for Bond.

Officially, MI6 didn't have a policy on relationships within the service. They had done once but it hadn't really worked; so many people had broken the rules that it became practically impossible to enforce them. Government officials had tried to oppose dropping the fraternisation rules but M had point blank ignored them. After all, she had pointed out, some of these men and women risked their lives for Queen and Country, so at the very least they deserved a bit of fun. She did regret the change in policy slightly when James Bond and Alec Trevelyan joined the ranks of the double-0 division and the number of broken-hearted, sobbing women in the secretarial pool alone rose sharply. All of the double-0's, but particularly 006 and 007, were notorious for their fly-by night trysts, leaving their bed partners utterly distraught, with the exception of one person; the Quartermaster.

There had been more than a few sceptics amongst MI6 when Major Boothroyd's replacement had been announced following the attack on Vauxhall, not least amongst the double-0 division. They had all been expecting to see R – who had been in 6 for years and had always been known to truly run the department for old Boothroyd – promoted, not some young upstart who looked all of about sixteen and had been hidden in the background for the entirety of his MI6 career to date.

Q had soon proven them wrong though. Starting with his efforts to stop Silva, not to mention his willingness to help Bond despite the possible risk to his own career, they had all been forced to eat their own words. What they had put down to the cocky arrogance of youth, he proved was simple assured confidence in his own abilities. It didn't take long for the double-0's and the other field agents to pronounce him the best Quartermaster that they had ever had, a conclusion that Q had been quietly confident they would have come to eventually anyway.

Despite a few wobbles at the start, it hadn't taken Q long to settle into his new role as Quartermaster and he found that, initial doubts aside, he relished it. He had been given complete rein over his department, allowed to reassign staff who no longer fitted the new era of espionage as well as hiring new staff, not to mention completely overhauling the networks and the security used by MI6. His inventions and gadgets were slowly being rolled out amongst all the field agents to rave reviews and he still got to use his hacking skills from time to time. He loved his job completely with the exception of one thing; the loss of his personal life.

He had been warned by M when he accepted the post that he did so to the detriment of his personal life; even if he was able to keep one going at first, it would eventually be sacrificed at the altar of British Intelligence. At first he hadn't entirely believed her, after all, she was married and so was Tanner but, as time progressed, he started to understand her. The amount of work that there had been to rebuild Q-branch, and indeed the rest of MI6, following Silva's attack on Vauxhall seemed never-ending but, even though they were still rebuilding, international espionage didn't come to a halt. They still needed the world to see that, despite what had happened, Britain and MI6 was as strong as ever so there were agents out on active missions the world over. Q seemed to be stuck in a constant cycle of building equipment, outfitting agents, running missions and being on call. Some weeks it felt as though he had forgotten what his flat looked like, never mind his social life, much to Q's disappointment.

As a teenager, then as a student and later an underling of Q-branch, Q had always been fond of going out to clubs and spending evenings dancing. If those evenings ended in sex, then they were even better, as he was almost as fond of sex as he was of dancing. He didn't even care that he didn't know the names of half the people he slept with, or that 90% of the time he never saw them again; he liked sex and he wasn't ashamed of that. Unfortunately, the title of Quartermaster meant that visiting the London club scene for a hedonistic whirl of dancing and sex for the odd night was apparently completely out of the question.

He was left with no other option; he would have to find what he needed at work. That brought its own problems though. Being head of a department, Q was somewhat limited in his options based on the people that he had regular interactions with. Mallory and Tanner were completely out of the question and, as lovely as she was, Eve Moneypenny just didn't do anything for him (although he was well aware that more than a few people would think him crazy for thinking so). He supposed that there were the other heads of departments to consider, but several of them were so horrifically old and old-school that he was fairly certain that the last time they had sex was several centuries ago, while the remainder were obviously painfully straight. Ethically, his minions were out of the question, although he was aware of the appreciative looks directed his way by more than a few of them and besides, he didn't want to have to deal with moping minions when he didn't want anything more than sex from them.

The only other people that he had regular interactions with were the double-0 division, seeing as R handled outfitting the regular field agents with their equipment. The moment that he thought of it, Q couldn't believe that he hadn't thought of it sooner. It really was the perfect solution to his problem. Every single one of them was easy on the eye, none of them were averse to sex and they all had reputations as fantastic lovers, although some were reputedly better than others. Besides, in the period since his promotion he had been propositioned by approximately half of them so he knew that an interest already existed. All that he was required to do was say yes to the next one that asked him.

  
~*~

Once Q had taken the plunge and started sleeping with the double-0 division, he had one absolute rule when it came to dealing with them; he only ever slept with them once. He had absolutely no intention of having a relationship with any of them or even falling into any sort of arrangement that revolved around sex. It always got far too complicated and he disliked complications at the best of times, but he especially hated complications when they ruined sex. Particularly when it was very good sex, which it had been with all of the double-0's. That wasn't to say that he had never been tempted to break his own rule. Admittedly, the temptation to do that had only occurred twice and the first time was with one of the most notorious double-0's there was: 006.

006, otherwise known as Alec Trevelyan, was one of the few double-0's to actually get Q into a real bed. Technically, he supposed that both 003 and 009 had been successful but he wasn't entirely sure if the beds in medical counted or not. It wasn't that Q objected to sex in a bed or that he was only interested in adventurous sex – far from it – it was just that the opportunity hadn't come up. At least, not unless Q had taken them back to his flat and he was loathe to do that; out of all the men and women that he'd ever had sex with over the years, he'd never brought any of them back to his flat and he didn't intend to change the habit any time soon.

006 was the only double-0 left for Q to meet when he received a message from M via Moneypenny saying that 006 was back in London and, as per habit, had holed up in his usual hotel and was refusing to come in. If Q wanted the equipment and information that he carried, then Q would have to go and retrieve it himself. 006 was one of two agents – 001 being the other – who specialised in long-term missions, often undercover, and wasn't frequently in London as a result. When he was in London, he could often be found raising merry hell with 007 and sleeping on said agent's couch if 007 was in town, or staying in a room at The Mayfair – which was where Q was currently headed.

Q had read 006's file to gather a bit of information but hadn't really bothered reading past the basics of physical description and how long he had been part of the service. Q never bothered reading entire files on his agents. For one, it took up far too much time that he simply didn't have and secondly, he much preferred getting to know his agents himself. Nevertheless, even having seen the photos kept on file, Q was completely unprepared for seeing Alec Trevelyan in the flesh.

R had described him as a blond Russian bear and, as the man stepped aside to let Q into the hotel room, Q could understand the description. The man dwarfed Q, not necessarily in height – although he was taller than Q – but definitely in breadth. He wasn't sure that he could describe the man as classically handsome but there was something undeniably attractive about the rugged, weathered features and the scar that bisected his eyebrow gave him a rakish look. Q didn't feel even the slightest bit of remorse for his perusal of 006, particularly not when he felt the agents gaze raking over him and looked up to see both approval and mischief glinting in green eyes.

Knowing that they were both on the same page, Q didn't waste any time in drawing out the collection of both the information and the equipment that 006 had returned with. The sooner that he dealt with business, the sooner they could get to the fun stuff.

He had just finished logging the last of Alec's equipment when there was a slight clink and a shot glass was placed on the table in front of him. Saving the files quickly and placing the equipment back in his bag, Q picked up the glass and knocked back the alcohol with a muttered “Za vashe zdorovie”, the slight burn telling him that, as he suspected, the glass had contained top quality Russian vodka. Smirking at the look on Alec's face, Q reached for the buttons on his cardigan and started to move in the direction of where he presumed the bedroom to be.

"Are you going to drink that anytime soon 006? Or am I going to have to start without you?"

  
~*~

The real test of Q's rule was 006's partner in crime; the one and only 007.

Q had had the feeling that he might be. Right from their very first meeting in the National Gallery there had been something there, some sort of spark. Something about Bond intrigued Q, he wasn't sure what it was. He had taken a gamble with their first conversation, somehow just knowing instinctively that he could get away with teasing the seasoned agent. Even so, he had been pleasantly surprised when Bond had teased him straight back and the snarky banter exchanged between the two of them in the following days as they fought against Silva set the tone for their interactions. Technically, they had remained professional in all of their encounters, whether inside MI6 or on the comms, but they had skirted close to the wind on more than a few occasions with their flirtatious and sarcastic comments.

Q had every intention of sleeping with Bond at some point or other. Why wouldn't he? He certainly hadn't put up with all of this sexual tension if he wasn't going to get something in return. After all, given the man's legendary reputation, Q was in for some truly wonderful sex and why would he say no to that? It was just a question of when it happened rather than if and, given Bond's recent tendency to hang around Q-branch, it would be happening sooner rather than later.

Speaking of the devil, a commotion amongst the minions inevitably meant that Bond had arrived for his daily visit to the Q-branch tunnels, appearing as he always did as though he knew that Q was thinking of him. Not wanting to give Bond any hint that he had been the object of his musings, Q kept his attention on his laptop as Bond made his way to Q's side and lounged against his work station.

“007, is there a reason you've parked yourself on my paperwork?”

“I was having drinks with 002 and 006 last night and found out an interesting bit of information.” Bond paused, ensuring that he, rather than the computer screen, had Q's full attention.“I don't know if I should be hurt that you slept with the rest of the double-0's before me or commend you on your foresight to leave the best until last.”

Q couldn't resist the urge to roll his eyes at the cheerful arrogance of the man. He had no intention of acknowledging that MI6 scuttlebutt did, in fact, confirm that James Bond was the best, whether that be as an agent or at bedplay. Honestly, it was amazing that the man could fit through doorways already considering the size of his ego.

“Just because I've slept with the rest of the double-0's doesn't automatically mean that I'm going to sleep with you Bond. It isn't as though I joined MI6 with the sole purpose of sleeping with the double-0 programme.”

“And I would never think that of you, Q. I just think that, having tasted what the rest of them have to offer, you might at least indulge yourself and experience the best.”

“Very sure of yourself, aren't you Bond?”

“Yes. Why wouldn't I be?”

Q battled to hide the smile that threatened. He had no doubt that Bond's self-assurance was well-deserved but he had no intention of falling into Bond's arms this very second. “Hmm. Well, no doubt I will see if you live up to your reputation at some point or other. Now, go away, I'm very busy and you're distracting my department.”

Q raised his chin almost defiantly and held Bond's gaze, seeing the moment that Bond accepted his challenge.

“Quartermaster.”

“007.”

Q watched as Bond sauntered out of the tunnels before he pushed his glasses up his nose and let the smile cross his lips. Bond was definitely going to test him, but by god, it was going to be good.

  
(~*~)

Q wasn't wrong.

He couldn't help but moan as he was slammed back against the door of the hotel room as Bond's lips slanted hungrily over his. He wasn't entirely sure how they had gotten to this point so quickly. Bond had managed to inveigle himself an invitation to drinks after work that usually just consisted of Q, Tanner and Moneypenny before offering to drive Q home at the end of the evening. Only, he hadn't driven Q home, he had driven him to this ridiculously upmarket hotel instead.

Not that Q was complaining.

This had been inevitable and he didn't see any point in further delaying the inevitable. Besides, since their conversation, Bond had been driving Q insane by being a walking, talking temptation in Q-branch. Q's cock had already been pressing uncomfortably against his trousers by the time that they reached Bond's car, the tension that had been simmering between the two of them since their first meeting finally bubbling over. Once inside the car, Q had been unable to resist teasing Bond, trailing his fingers up the inside of Bond's inner thigh and over the matching bulge in Bond's trousers before Bond had taken Q's hand in his, trapping it over the gearstick in an attempt to control Q's wandering fingers.

Bond had kept hold of Q's hand while he had checked them in but then, as soon as they were inside the lift and the doors had closed behind them, he had made his move. Q had found himself crowded up against the wall of the lift, his wrists pinioned either side of his head. After Q's earlier antics in the car, Bond seemed determined to pay Q back for his teasing and, rather than kissing Q as he wanted, kept grazing his lips over Q's lips and cheek. Q couldn't help but moan in frustration as even arching his back and craning his neck failed to get him what he wanted.

It was only once they were out of the lift and the door to the room Bond had booked had slammed shut behind them that Bond stopped his teasing and finally kissed Q. It was all heat, the sexual tension between the two of them finally spilling over, teeth clashing together and noses bumping. And then Bond took control of the kiss, claiming Q and it was everything that Q had envisaged. Bond used his grip on Q's hips to pull him across the room, their lips fused together as they kicked off their shoes, trying not to trip over. Sizeable as the room was, Q soon found himself with the bed pressing into the back of his knees. Once there, Bond wasted no time in stripping Q of his clothing until he was completely nude while Bond remained fully-clothed.

Before Q knew it, he was sprawled across the ridiculously large bed with Bond stood at the foot of it staring at him hungrily. Smirking, and wanting to tease Bond just a little bit more, Q let his fingers play over his chest before moving them down towards his cock, gaining precisely the reaction that he wanted when Bond growled and started pulling off his own clothes. Q did nothing but watch the show, palming his cock as he did so. Finally, Bond was crawling onto the bed and over Q, spearing a hand through Q's hair, his grip just on the pleasurable side of painful and pulling him up into a searing kiss before pulling back.

“How do you want to do this?”

“Fuck me. Now.”

“Not shy about what you want, are you?” Amusement tinged Bond's voice.

“Why should I be? Just get on with it Bond.”

“With pleasure, Q.”

Q went willingly as Bond pushed him back against the bed, spreading his legs eagerly as Bond settled over him, a packet of lube already open off to the side of Q. Q's head thudded back against the pillows as the first of Bond's slick fingers slid inside him, swiftly followed by a second. He bucked his hips as Bond's fingers grazed past his prostate, trying to encourage Bond for more.

To Q's immense relief though, Bond didn't seem to be interested in dragging this out for any longer than absolutely necessary. He prepared Q thoroughly but swiftly and it wasn't long before Bond was sitting back on his heels, ripping open one of the condom packets and rolling it over his cock before slicking it up.

Q could hear his breath hitch as Bond pressed into him steadily until he was completely sheathed inside. It hadn't been that long since he had last had sex – some random that he had found in a club on a rare night off – but it had been a long time since he had had sex with someone as well-endowed as Bond. As a result, he was grateful when Bond paused, leaning down to capture Q's lips in a filthy kiss before he started to move. Q wrapped his leg around Bond's hip in an attempt to encourage him to move more as Bond changed the angle of his thrusts continuously until Q couldn't help but whimper, his hands clutching at Bond's shoulders as Bond's cock finally raked over his prostate. Q rolled his hips as best as he could as his hands raked across Bond's back and shoulders, encouraging him to speed up his thrusts, something that Bond seemed determined to ignore, much to Q's frustration, particularly when Bond once more changed the angle of his thrusts to avoid Q's prostate.

“Alec told me that you were like a kitten in bed. Do you bite as well as scratch?”

Q couldn't help but growl at the man, resisting the urge to do so again when Bond kept thrusting at the same slow speed, a smirk on his face that said he knew exactly what he was doing.

“Don't hold back Q, I want to hear you.”

“Well, if you want to hear me then you'll have to put your back into it, won't you 007? ”

“Challenge accepted, Q.”

And Bond more than rose to the challenge. Bond sped up his thrusts, finally giving Q what he wanted by aiming his thrusts to hit Q's prostate with every movement. Q couldn't help but be loud, moans of pleasure and expletives flying off his tongue as he rocked back into Bond's thrusts as best as he could.

“Stroke yourself,” the words were breathless as Bond continued thrusting and Q obeyed, sliding a hand between them to take hold of his cock. He was already so close to orgasm, just from Bond's cock raking unerringly over his prostate. With a hand on his cock, it didn't take long before Q was coming convulsively around Bond's cock with a loud cry, his come spurting all over his stomach and, a few thrusts later, hearing Bond's low moan in his ear as Bond slumped over him.

Q watched, turning over sluggishly as, having carefully pulled out of Q, Bond got out of bed and meandered into the en-suite bathroom to dispose of the condom. Squinting slightly, Q's somewhat blurry eyes focused on Bond standing unabashedly naked in the doorway to the bathroom and his cock twitched in interest at the sight, despite his orgasm only moments previously.

“Any chance I can tempt you into a shower, Quartermaster?”

“I don't know Bond, can you?”

The look that Bond shot Q said everything and, even though Q would normally be leaving by now, instead he found himself following Bond into the en-suite.

  
(~*~)

Several hours later, after a lengthy shower that had ended with Q on his knees in front of Bond and a brief break for some stupidly decadent room service and champagne, Q found himself indulging in a third bout of sex with Bond. Riding Bond's cock, calloused fingers digging into his hips while Bond mouthed hungrily at Q's neck and collarbones, Q could confirm three things.

One, he had already slept with Bond more than once and the evening seemed far from over.

Two, grand old warship or not, Bond's reputation was definitely not exaggerated. In fact, as far as Q was concerned, the evening had more than surpassed what he had been expecting.

Three, one night with James Bond was not going to be enough.

  
~*~

“I don't suppose that's for me, is it?”

Q did his best not to show that Bond had managed to sneak up on him but, looking over his shoulder, he had the feeling that he had failed miserably judging from the slight smirk on the older man's face. “Well that depends, doesn't it?”

“On what?”

Q tried to focus his attention on the Mosin Nagant rifle in front of him that he was examining to see if it could be customised. 006 had brought it back for Q from his last mission and Q had been eager to get his hands on a weapon that was Russia's most historically proven early battle rifle. He realised that his attempts at ignoring Bond had failed miserably when he found himself examining the same part of the rifle for the third time. Now that he knew that Bond was there, he was hyper-aware of the man behind him.

“Oh I don't know. How about, depending on if you've been good or not?” Q couldn't hold back the shiver as Bond all but purred in his ear.

“You know I'm always good, Q.”

Q rolled his eyes, even as he allowed his lips to curl up at the corners. He knew how this was going to end or at least he hoped he did; preferably with him blissfully fucked out from Bond's ministrations. Still, even though he had every intention of giving in to Bond, that didn't mean that he couldn't have a bit of fun first. He did so enjoy the flirtatious banter between the two of them that had acted as their version of foreplay on more than one occasion.

“Oh, I don't know if I'd go that far Bond...”

Q fought to hold back any sign of a reaction as Bond's hands found their way to his hips and Bond pressed himself against the length of Q's back. Bond was like a furnace, radiating heat as he nosed at Q's neck, nipping gently at Q's jawline.

“Careful Q, you'll hurt my feelings.”

Knowing that he wasn't going to get any work done with Bond in his current mood, Q put the rifle down and turned awkwardly so that he was facing Bond, leaning against the work table.

“Well, we can't have your feelings hurt can we?” Q murmured, looking up at Bond a little coquettishly through his lashes. If Bond was like this, then Q might as well reap the benefits.

“Not at all. Besides, I'm very, very good as you well know.”

Q turned his head so that he could capture Bond's lips, giving Bond's lower lip a teasing nip as he pulled back.

“Well, it has been a while. I think I may need a bit of a reminder.”

“Q, it would be my pleasure.”

All Q could do was wrap his arms around Bond's neck and do his best to reciprocate as Bond's mouth claimed his, everything about the kiss screaming possession.

Q had known, from the first time that he slept with Bond, that this was going to be the man to test his resolve. 006 had come close but 007 was the man who had made Q break his own rule. Q was actually starting to lose track of the number of times that he had slept with the agent yet the sex was still as good as it had been the first time. Bond's reputation as a wonderful lover was truly well-deserved. Q was quite certain that sex with James Bond had ruined him for sex with anyone else for the rest of his life; no-one else had even come close to giving him the same amount of pleasure. Even Alec hadn't been that good.

Wonderful sex aside, there was just something about Bond that made it virtually impossible for Q to simply walk away from the man. He had some sort of magnetism about him that just kept drawing Q back in for more. Q found himself wanting to stay in bed with the man, wanted to exchange conversation with him that was more than their usual snarky banter. Sometimes he got the feeling that Bond wanted the same things but who could tell? The man was a spy for a living, so of course he would be able to hide his true thoughts and feelings.

Q knew that there was a high chance that he was undoubtedly going to regret his inability to turn Bond down in the future, that he had had his rule in place for a reason. But, as Bond's lips trailed down his neck and hands slipped into the back of his trousers to cup his arse, the moment for regret definitely wasn't now.

Besides, rules were made to be broken. Weren't they?

**Author's Note:**

> If you would prefer to comment on LJ, you can do so [here](http://vix-spes.livejournal.com/217935.html)


End file.
